TACTics Journal

A Publication for and by TOC for Education Practitioners

April 7, 2000

CONTENTS

            REQUEST

                  (1)     Call for Curriculum Applications to be shared at Conference 2000, Kathy Suerken

            WIZDOM

                  (2)     Anne’s Cloud, Part I, Denise Meyer

                        (3)     Diary of a Newbie in TACT Block, Wong Siew Shan

            NETWORKING

                  (4)     Continued Reflections/Discussions on the Never Ending Story…, Kathy Suerken

                Elementary/Secondary TACTS

                        (5)     Scenarios for Classroom Practice, Denise Meyer

                CONNECTIONS

                        (6)     4th Annual TOC for Education International Conference

                        (7)     TOC for Education in Action

                EDITORS’ NOTE

                  (8)     Kay Buckner-Seal and Cheryl Edwards

REQUEST

(1)     Call for Curriculum Applications to be shared at Conference 2000

By Kathy Suerken

 

Have you used any of the TOC tools in teaching curriculum?   A curriculum content strand is being developed for our 4th International TOCFE Conference. Your work can be shared formally (a presentation) or informally (hand-out examples/case studies).  Presentations can be as short as 10 minutes or as long as 50 minutes.  We are seeking ideas at any stage of development  (work in progress).

Please carefully consider including YOUR idea(s) in the development of these TOC applications which are so essential to improving the way we teach and learn.  What a way to make a lasting and far-reaching difference in education!!!!   Contact Kathy at suerken@nwfl.net.

WIZDOM

(2)      Anne’s Cloud, Part I

By Denise Meyer, Los Angeles, CA, USA

 

      Anne worked as a special resource teacher at a year-round school.  She had struggled to get an education and a good job when she became a single mom at the age of 21.   She had gotten married but it hadn’t worked out and now she was raising her son alone with some help and support from her mother.

      Anne was having many difficulties with her teenage son and felt that she needed some help.  She had been to counselors, talked with her sister and friends asking for advice, read books on assertive discipline and was trying to implement all the things they had advised her to do.  But, either they didn’t work or she didn’t know how to do it all consistently.  More and more her son, Jaime, was talking back and not respecting her authority.  At one of the school staff meetings, she heard about a course in conflict resolution.  There would be a presentation at a neighboring school.  Maybe this would help her with her son.  Besides, conflict resolution was something she had always wanted to include in her work with students.  It might be a good thing to learn.  She decided to go to the presentation.

      She was very impressed with the presentation.  The examples of work done by students in the area of conflict resolution, the graphic organizers, and the comments that came from teachers who had used the program with students were very impressive.  This was different from other programs she had seen.  Where other programs told students to stop, think, and brainstorm solutions, this one told them how to think and come up with solutions that really addressed the underlying needs in the conflicts.  In addition, there seemed to be a component that helped students see how their own actions affected outcomes and how they could take responsibility for changing negative outcomes.  She decided she wanted to attend the training for the program.

      The initial presentation was in November and the actual class would only take place in February.  Being a year round employee, she had vacations that were flexible so she could service all the students at the school.  She decided to ask her boss if she could switch her vacation time to go to the training.  He usually tried to accommodate special needs of employees.  She knew that planning ahead of time would help her and felt comfortable asking him.  She was right.  He said, “No problem.  As a matter of fact, a course in resolving conflict will enhance your job skills.  You can take the course on work time.  Maybe when you come back you can share some of what you learned with the rest of the staff.”  This was wonderful news and Anne was really happy.

      About a week before the course was going to start, Mr. Alvarez asked her to attend a reading conference on Wednesday morning of the same week as the training!  “But that’s the week I’m going to be at the Conflict Resolution Training!” she reminded him.

      “Well, you know how those week-long things usually are.  You can skip one morning to attend the conference.”  Anne didn’t respond.  She felt angry and frustrated at being asked to change her plans.  She really didn’t see why she needed to go to the conference.  She wasn’t the only person on the Literacy Committee and there were other teachers who could go.

      On Monday of the training week she went to the class.  It was wonderful!  She learned a new way to look at conflicts.  Conflicts do not occur because people are mean and malicious, but rather because they are working from different needs that they are trying to satisfy.  Although our needs are not in conflict, our way of meeting those needs may be.  When her son was arguing with her over going out with his friends and she was arguing for him to stay home, there were important needs each one of them was trying to satisfy, like his social needs and her need to keep him safe.  There was nothing wrong with the needs.  They just had to find ways to make sure their needs were met without clashing over how.

      On the second day she began to realize how important the skills she was learning were.  The more she thought about the conference that she was supposed to attend on Wednesday morning, the more upset she became at the request.  She began to realize that this was one of those times she should be using the new tools she had learned.  But she felt too unsure of her own understanding of the tools to use them in a real life situation. 

      She began to rationalize not going to herself.  After all, she hadn’t really said she was going to attend.  They had sort of left it up in the air.  Mr. Alvarez hadn’t told her the exact time of the conference or where it was and she knew there were some other teachers that would be attending.  Surely, if he really expected her to be there, he would have told her these things.  Maybe she could just not go.  This was the easiest and customary way she dealt with conflict.  She didn’t want to cause a big fuss by confronting him with the fact that he had promised her she could go to this training three months ago.  She did not want to confront him directly and then be told to “be there.”  She would just let it slide.  Maybe he wouldn’t really miss her.  Probably not.  Surely her presence wasn’t that crucial.

      Wednesday came around and she had convinced herself that the minor upset of her boss was not as important as the course and decided not to attend the conference.  After the session, she was glad she had stayed but felt very uncomfortable about her next encounter with Mr. Alvarez. 

      Thursday came.  The class was really interesting and she was learning a lot.  But again, inside of her was that uncomfortable feeling that she had not been up front with the principal.  She hated that feeling.  She decided at the end of the day to stop by the school and apologize and explain her behavior. 

      As she arrived, she saw him in the office.  The minute he saw her he said, “We missed you on Wednesday.”

      “I’m sorry.  I wasn’t really sure that you needed me.  And anyway, I didn’t know when the meeting was,” she answered.

      “You could have called,” he responded.  “And by the way, I’m having a staff meeting in the morning and I expect you to be there.  Nine o’clock as usual.”

      Anne knew better than to respond to him.  She left the room and sat down at one of the desks in the office.  Almost everyone had gone home and she was feeling close to tears.  One more time, he was taking her time away from what she wanted to be doing.  He was being so insensitive.  She had asked him in November if she could do this and here at the last minute he was imposing his will on her.  He just wanted to prove how powerful he was.  He didn’t really need her there.  She was so furious!…To be continued, TACTics, April 14. 

(3)      Diary of a Newbie in TACT Block

Wong Siew Shan, Vice-Principal, Jing Shan Primary School, Singapore

 

Editor’s Note:  The first two entries of “Diary of a Newbie in TACT Block” dated 24.2.2000 and 26.2.2000 were published in TACTics, March 10, 2000.  We are proud to publish two more entries of Shan’s powerful and most inspiring work in this week’s TACTics.

 

28.2.2000

      After recess, two boys were sent to my room.  Joel for calling Alex names and Alex for using vulgar language and biting Joel on his arm till it bled. Previously, I would have mourned inwardly and handled the problem before sending them back to their classes.  After they leave my room, I would file their case sheets in the “Misbehaviour File” for future reference.  But today, I was looking forward to empowering these two boys to resolve their own conflict.

      It was heartening to note how easily they got the hang of how to use the Cloud template.  After writing that to have fun, he needed to call Alex names, Joel immediately looked at me sheepishly and said that it wasn’t really true! On surfacing his assumptions, he himself saw that they did not stand up to scrutiny.  In fact, he came up with his own injection and said that he could invite Alex to play with him.  Joel could also understand Alex’s need to be respected.  He promised not to call Alex names again.

      The situation also lent itself very much to the use of the Negative Branch.  As the incident has just occurred and he was one of the main characters in it, Joel could draw the NBr very fast.  In fact he extrapolated and said, “If we are sent to the VP’s office, we will miss out on revision.  If we miss out on revision, we will not do well at CA.  If we do not do well in CA, everybody is unhappy.”  In introducing the NBr technique and helping Joel and Alex think through the negative aspects of their behaviour by themselves, I sincerely believe I have given them a framework on which they can critically assess any intended plans of action in the future and modify them accordingly before carrying them out.  It seems a very simple tool but one that would have far-reaching impact on both their lives if they internalise it. In empowering them, I have empowered myself.  And it felt wonderful!

      Both boys apologised to each other for the hurt they have caused the opposite party.  They were very specific about what they were sorry for— they have been surfaced very visually on the cloud.  I could tell they really meant it from the bottom of their hearts.  They promised that they would never hurt each other in the same way.  I believed them totally.  Conflicts are bound to happen sometimes but I trust that they would not have to experience the same conflict situation again with each other.  If they have the same conflict with another, I am confident that they would know how to resolve it because they have been empowered with the tools.

      Satisfied with the way the case turned out, I wondered how I could further work on Caroline that night.  Shall I refine the cloud further? Shall I continue with the cloud and complete the injection?  Shall I do the N.Br with her?  Finally, I told myself to take things as they come.

[Editor’s Note: Shan shared her first experience with using the cloud with her daughter Caroline in TACTics 3/10/2000.  The conflict they were working on was : Read storybooks before doing homework/read storybooks after doing homework.]

      On reaching home at 7.00 PM that evening, I was upset that I couldn’t have my bath because Caroline was bathing.  She has been specifically instructed to bathe before 7:00 p.m.  Raising my voice a decibel, I asked, “Caroline, why didn’t you bathe earlier?” 

      In answer to my question, she rattled off all the homework that she has completed for the day.  She asked, “You did ask me to set my priorities didn’t you?”

      Incredulously, I asked, “You mean you have completed all your homework?” 

      “Well, almost. I still have 2 sentences to write.”  Just at that moment, she opened the bathroom door.  Impulsively, I gave her a big bear hug.  I haven’t done that in a long time!

      So what actually happened?  Months of nagging had not worked. The cloud helped us to clarify our needs to each other and work through our assumptions. Surfacing the needs and assumptions helped both of us to understand why we do or do not do certain things. It has also enabled a deeper understanding and insight into each other’s needs. In this case, I have verbalised my reasoning that completing the homework before reading storybooks is better time management. Also she needs to set her priorities. Although!! I didn’t belabour the point, it must have convinced her to change at least for the day. Maybe she is just trying out this new way of doing things to see if it has its merits. Whatever her reasons, I am thankful for this positive reaction after months of passivity.

 

29.2.2000

      My confidence in the use of the Cloud and the NBr has grown tremendously, fuelled by the positive results that I receive in all my attempts.  Today, I decided to take on a bigger challenge.  I had my Math Remedial Class today.  “Good opportunity to practise on them,” I told myself gleefully.  But truthfully, if my need were only to practise on them, I would not have wasted 20 minutes of 21 of my students’ life.  I have this strong conviction that this investment would reap a harvest far more valuable than we can fathom.  Can we ever quantify the value of a gift that will affect ourselves, our family members, our friends, our colleagues at the workplace, the nation and in turn the world?

      I worked through the Cloud with them. The conflict was that students did not want to do their corrections and I want them to do their corrections.  We went on to use the NBr.  I was quite surprised that they could think of the cause and effect in the chain quite easily.  All I did was to help focus them with relevant questions.  Although we had not been taught the PBr, I tried to use my own brand of it.  All in all, it was a very satisfying experience.  I hope that I will see some changes by 3.3.2000 when I have my next class with these pupils.  But even if I see no concrete results or positive indications, I would not say that I have engaged 20 minutes of every student in vain.  They would have been exposed to 3 powerful focusing tools and gone through the problem-solving process, which they could use to think through behaviours so that they could begin to make responsible choices.

      As I was reflecting on the Math lesson that afternoon, Desiree (my 10-year-old daughter) came into my bedroom.  “Mum, can you write a letter to my Chinese Language teacher, requesting for permission for me to join her Chinese Remedial lessons?” 

      My first reaction was one of total disbelief. Which child in her right mind would want to attend remedial classes if she has not been chosen?  “Why would you want to join the Chinese Remedial lessons?”  I asked Desiree.  “The fact that you have not been asked to attend remedial sessions shows that you are doing relatively well. Therefore, I don’t see why I should waste my time writing the letter for you!”  Oops! How insensitive I could be at times.  I realised it too late.  I tried to retrieve my words but it was too late. 

      I noticed Desiree’s eyes turn red as a drop of tear rolled down her cheeks.

It tore my heart to see how much I had upset her by my total disregard for her needs.  I said, “Being able to attend the Chinese remedial lessons is really very important to you, isn’t it?  Have you thought about the whole issue very, very seriously?  Are you aware that it would reflect very badly on you and me if you decide later that you really don’t want to attend the remedial sessions?”  She nodded to indicate that she had.  “Would you like to do a cloud for this little dilemma of yours? Maybe you could also convince me about writing your teacher the letter you requested for.”

      So it was that Desiree drew her first cloud that night.  Her cloud revealed to me some of her feelings about the learning of Chinese that had never before been revealed to me.  Her cloud communicated to me her insecurities about learning the Chinese Language and her quest to do better in a subject that I thought she was doing well in— that’s what I call self-motivation!  I never knew that she was feeling frustrated because she couldn’t get any help in Chinese at home—!! somehow her feelings had never been verbalised before.  Well, we never had this wonderful tool called the Evaporating Cloud back then! 

 

More of “Diary of a Newbie in TACT Block,” by Wong Siew Shan will be published in next week's TACTics.

NETWORKING

(4)      TOC now and in the future...the Never Ending discussion continues!

By Kathy Suerken

 

Let's summarize where we are:

We agree that we want to solve problems where they begin.   Are there obstacles to so doing?   Can they be overcome if we identify the conflict where it begins? In the story example in both Session 1 of TACT and in THE NEVER ENDING STORY workbook for students, we suggest the conflict begins when the students both want the same desk...not when the situation escalates and becomes part of another problem.  In the story for Session 1 of TACT and the student workbook, we model how to guide the students back to the very beginning of the problem.   To write the cloud (both wants and needs)
before it gets complicated by other issues.

But which is the day-to-day problem?  The one that is simple or the one which has escalated?  What do you think?

Do you agree that we tend not to notice problems until they escalate?  Therefore, we also tend to identify them (in other words, define d and d') by where the problem is when we notice it--by where it leads rather than where it begins.  Because we associate 'day-to-day problems' with these more
complicated problems, I prefer to think of Session 1 as the application of TOC to 'simple problems.' If that does not sound like an enticing enough application, let's consider it as 'conflict prevention'-an application of TOC to nip conflicts in the bud before they become complicated 'differences of perception.'

That terminology is exactly how Mary Ellen Bourbeau characterized this application when we were testing it with a group of 8th grade students at Purcell's Middle School where she is a counselor in Grosse Pointe, Michigan.  "This is exactly the application I need! " she excitedly told me.

Marina Rodriguez in Monterrey, Mexico echoed her response as she read and endorsed the new story for Session 1.  "This application addresses just the behavior that is so often experienced and accepted as normal behavior in classrooms.  And yet it leads to so many problems for teachers.  We need to intervene at this early stage."

Yes, but...will it lead to sustainable results?   Does it make sense that if kids learn how to solve problems before they escalate, they will be less likely to accumulate 'deeper' problems?

What about those who already have the deeper problems?   In my experience, a mediation that guides students to identify problems before they escalate not only enables them to successfully fix the problem at hand (and experience win/win) but also models a process for the next time.  I have many examples of students who begin to use the process on their own as a result.

Also, there is additional value which comes from writing a first cloud with someone else.  That experience preempts a lot of erroneous assumptions about the other side's needs or, at least, provides opportunity to immediately challenge those assumptions.  Either way, it opens communications very fast.

I agree with Francis Su's injections, however, to ensure both short and long term solutions.   If we mediate 'everyday' conflicts between two people as simply and tangibly (and Socratically!) as possible, they are more likely to follow through on solutions to that problem.   In order to ensure that those
two people are able to solve the next problem, they need to understand the process itself.   In other words, in order to bring improvements now and in the future, we need to mediate the conflict between the two parties as a simple conflict if at all possible and to teach the process itself to the student.  Since we teach by example, the mediation process itself is an excellent first lesson for the student.

Perhaps then we will hear more stories like the one shared by Eli at our 1999 International Conference.   He told of a kindergarten class in Israel where the cloud elements exist on mats for the students to use when there is conflict.   One student approached another on a peacekeeping mission!  Pulling the cloud mat up to his classmate, he suggested: "Let's get on the mat.  I'm about to have a conflict with you!"

Please share thoughts and comments with Kathy: suerken@nwfl.net

ELEMENTARY/SECONDARY TACTICS

(5)      Scenarios for Classroom Practice

By Denise Meyer, Los Angeles, CA. USA

 

“The following are the "simple" day to day conflicts according to middle school students.  What a commentary on our society.  How important is our work!” —Denise

 

Editor’s Note:  The following scenarios can be used in the classroom as a springboard for identifying conflicts, constructing clouds, and/or surfacing needs and assumptions.  Try them in your classroom, then share the results in next weeks TACTics.  Send to:  bucknek@resa.net

 

Scenario 1—

Today the teacher plans on putting us in groups to work on a project.  He wants to put me in a group that I don’t want to work with.  Tony is in this group.  I don’t want to be in a group with him.  Why can’t we choose who we want to work with?

 

Scenario 2—

I have a friend who has a very short temper.  Yesterday, when I was late and she had to wait for me for a few minutes, she got very upset.  She called me a name that I didn’t like at all.  I don’t want her to do that again.

CONNECTIONS

(6)     4th Annual TOC for Education International Conference

          Sheraton Ambassador Hotel

          Monterrey, Mexico

          August 9-12, 2000

Lodging: (*Room rates are based on single OR  double occupancy.)

Classic room—  $86(+tax) For more than two people to a room, there is a $15.00 charge for each extra person.

Executive room—$116(+tax) For more than two people to a room there is a $25.00 charge for each extra person.

 

Registration for conference rates must be made before July 25.  After this date, rooms will be released and on a space available basis.  Make reservations directly with the hotel by identifying yourself as a member of TOC for Education.

           

            To make reservations from:

               Mexico — (direct to the hotel):                                     1.800.832.8400 

                       USA & Canada— (central reservation):                          1.800.325.3535

           Nations outside of North America—(switchboard):        528.380.7000

(7)     TOC for Education in Action

Israel

Upgrade TACT Workshop, Elementary Teachers

Gila Glatter

Pedagogical Center Netanya

14 meetings

April-June

 

TOC for Ed Club Meeting

Kfar-Amakabiya, Ramat-Gan

May 4

 

Second Annual TOC for Education Conference/Israel

Country Club, Cuntry-Class, Tel-Aviv

May 26

 

TACT Workshop

Gila Glatter, Nava Wies, Rami Goldratt

June 25-29

July 1-6

 

Upgrading with the Tools in Texts

(for better use in classrooms)

Tel-Aviv and Petach-Tikva

Rami Goldratt, Gila Glatter, Nava Wies

August 25-26

 

Upgrade: How to Make Good Decisions

Petach-Tikva

Dr. Limor Winter-Kraemer

August 25-26

 

TACT Workshop

Mofet Institute, Tel-Aviv

Gila Glatter

September 3-7

Netherlands

TOCFE POOGI Workshop.

Eleanor May-Brenneker

May 2000.

Philippines

10 TACT Workshops hosted by the Makati City Division of the Department of Education and Sports and Culture

June 19-24

July 26-July 1

*Please note: These classes were originally scheduled for April.

Russia

Avante Garde Conference in Moscow

Galina Doyla and David Higgins

April 18, 2000

Singapore

TACT Facilitators Class

Taught by Kathy Suerken

The Singapore Center for Teaching Thinking -National Institute of Education

June 19-23

 

Nanayang Technological University

Public Address given by Kathy Suerken

June 24

Taiwan

TACT Class for Elementary and Junior-High School Teachers

Chiao-Tung University, Hsinchu

Frances Su

Wednesdays, April 12-May 31

USA

Session 1 “Resolving Day to Day Conflicts”

University of Liggett School, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI

Mary Ellen Bourbeau and Doug Roby

April 7

 

Session 2- Thinking Through Consequences

University of Liggett School, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI

Mary Ellen Bourbeau and Doug Roby

April 15

 

Cloud Training— Resolving Day to Day Conflicts

Los Angeles Unified School District, CA

Denise Meyer, Remedeas Kelly-Weekes

April 28, 29, May 5

 

TACT Workshop for Resource Coordinating Team Members

Joy Middle School Detroit Public Schools, MI

Larry Till

May 3

 

TACT Workshop

St. Clair Community College, MI Teacher Institute

Larry Till

June 30

 

Summer TACT Workshops

St. Clair Community College, MI

Larry Till

Registration: Carol Nickles at 810.989.5740— CEU’s available

(8)   EDITORS’ NOTE

We would like to thank Denise Meyer, Los Angeles and Wong Siew Shan, Singapore for their contributions to this week's TACTics.  To our entire TOCFE Family, please continue to share so that we all may maintain our POOGI.  Have a pleasant week!

 

Send HYPERLINK to:

            bucknek@resa.net

            redwards@sault.com  NEW E-MAIL ADDRESS!

Send mail to:

            Cheryl A. Edwards

            2253 S. Hill Island Road

            Cedarville, MI 49719 USA