TACTics Journal
A Publication for and by TOC for Education Practitioners
In this week’s issue:
Connections
(1) My Comments on the TOCFE Conference, Javier Arevalo
Editor’s Notes
(2) Kay Buckner-Seal
CONNECTIONS
(1) My Comments on the TOCFE Conference
From Javier Arevalo,
Cheryl, I wanted to share my impressions, and the benefits I have
obtained
from our last conference…late but here it is and I hope it adds
some value to
the group.
The first thing that I must clarify, is that my perspective comes
from a
person in business trying to help move TOCFE into education in my
country
(
for me were three things:
1. Coming from business, it is reassuring and also humbling to see
the
degree and speed of spread of TOCFE into several different fields
within
the education community and the teaching subjects. The work that
Belinda
Small, Danilo Sirias and Francois Moll shared is impressive and
goes to show
how much each person can do specifically in their area of
expertise within
education. The lessons here are one of absolute commitment to
sharing the
knowledge. It empowers the community of educators to grow and
continue
to expand the use of the tools. It carries an underlying theme of
community
and belonging that again strikes home. If we could run our
businesses and
relationships with the intent and purpose that these folks are
showing us, we
would be in a much better place.
2. It was great to see all of the people from the different
countries again,
and to be able to nurture those relationships in person. Thanks to
all for the
fun, the words, the work, the level of energy is contagious and
one wonders
if this is really work!
3. The conference track that I attended and that was extremely
useful
was the one led by Audrey Taylor. Thanks to her, to Rami, and the
entire
group. The experience was very useful as it gave me the
opportunity to
revisit the relationships I have with my clients and people I set
out to
influence. To understand that a client (thus someone I am trying
to
persuade of my GREAT idea) will not move until we have covered and
solved
all of the layers of resistance to change. If we realize that in
reality there
are no conflicts and that reality is simple, and that our issues
usually remain
conflicts from our lack of understanding of what we think, and
doing the
work to understand and where the other person stands or why they
are
blocked from seeing the benefits for them, only then we can
properly
address those layers and arrive at the point where they are ready
to
embrace the idea.
The discovery, if you will, while working at the conference on
this area with
the group and Audrey was that usually we need to work hard at
defining the
needs that are below the issue. Only then we can really begin to
understand
how to start or where to unblock us in our communication with our
prospects.
A: The objective that will be achieved and will provide gains for
both of
us, be it individually or as part of the whole.
B: The need that really motivates me to drive this process
forward, and
that according to me has to be satisfied in this particular way
with D.
D: This is the action or decision I made to handle and satisfy the
need I
have in relation to the objective at hand.
C: The need that motivates the other side actions, decision,
position
D’: The actions that are in conflict with my chosen direction,
action or
Decision.
So generically, a big concern that I was trying to address was how
do I
generate trust in the relationship with the client, the person I
am trying to
persuade of the value of my idea?
A: To generate trust
B: I must show understanding and knowledge of the
client’s/person’s
Problem.
D: I must be prescriptive and show what I know and direct where
and
how to move.
C: The client must feel I am trustworthy, sensitive.
D’: I must let the client/person lead the way.
Work out this cloud if you want to, by exposing the assumptions or
adapting
them to your process. I will tell you what my injection was—I
called the
person that I had been trying to persuade and just asked questions
and
manifested our interest in working through obstacles and issues.
That is all
it took.
Just recently I feel that we started to move forward faster on the
persuasion and the interest in our proposal. Thus we are probably
at a
different layer of resistance. They were willingly sharing with us
their
concerns and now it seems that they are the ones pushing to move
faster
into the process. It works!
Finally, the other element that I think would be useful is thinking
about the
layers of resistance. Clearly there is always an issue embedded
inside the
first layer we discussed—There is no “Problem,” or “A Problem-Who me?-I
am Fine” layer. There is also the need to answer the question, “Why do I
need to change? I may have the problem; but, hey, I am coping and
that is
the best I can do.” I think that if this is not properly addressed, then we
may get stuck, even if we agree that there is a problem.
I would be happy to hear your thoughts about this.
Thanks to all,
Javier
EDITOR’S NOTES
(2) Kay Buckner-Seal
Javier, thanks so very much for sharing your insights with us!
And, we do
hope some of our readers get a chance to share their thoughts
about your
concerns with that first layer of resistance. So, TACTics’ readers, feel
free to share with us. Send your responses, applications of the
thinking
processes, lessons, announcements, and etc. by mail to: Cheryl A.
Edwards,
2253 S. Hill Island Rd., Cedarville, Michigan 49719, USA. Or send
hyperlink
to cedwards@cedarville.net or bucknek@earthlink.net.
Please note that the pdf version of TACTics is attached. You must
have
Acrobat Reader to open the file. It is freely available for
download from:
http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readstep.html. If you have
the
Reader installed but still can't open the file, drag it from this
e-mail to your
desktop, launch the Reader, and open from the FILE menu.
You may also view TACTics in its intended formatting, by visiting
our web
site at www.tocforeducation.com. Click on “What’s New.”